John 3:16

“For God so loved the world, He gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but have everlasting life.”

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When you just don’t understand

My heart is breaking tonight. One of my very best friend’s is losing her nephew. He’s only one week old. Her brother and his girlfriend welcomed a beautiful baby boy into this world one week ago today. They held him, fed him, and loved him at first sight. Then in just a short 24 hours everything changed. He developed an infection and a host of other things eventually bringing us to today where they were faced with an impossible to comprehend situation. I’m not going to go into too many other details out of respect for the family. 

I try to take comfort in knowing he will soon rest in Jesus’ arms. It’s just times like these when life isn’t fair. It doesn’t make any sense. It hurts. My heart breaks for this family. We’ve seen this little boy bring so many people together and restore broken relationships in his short week here on Earth, but how can it be over so soon? Why? We will never understand why God needs him more than us. 

I have no words for his family. I feel like I’m experiencing all the stages of grief in one evening. I can only imagine how they are feeling. I want to hold my child close and never let her go. There are no words that can bring comfort in a situation like this. Hugs, tears, memories of those first 24 hours with him in his parents arms and holding one another close this past week. Those will be what this family needs to get through each moment from here on out. 

Be present with your loved ones. Hold them close. Tell them you love them and let things go. Know that this earth is fleeing and eternity is near. 

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The end of a journey 

I’ve written a post or two and haven’t been able to publish them. I ended up deleting them and now I wish I hadn’t. Anyway I’m glad to be back. Between discouragement over writing a post only to not be able to post it and also keeping up with a toddler I’ve gotten out of the habit of writing. I’ve had plenty on my mind but I feel the blog issues have been resolved just in time. 

Latest news is we have stopped breastfeeding. I had no idea how long we’d make it and I have to admit 17 months is quite the accomplishment. I always believed it would end when M was ready and well, it did. It went much smoother than I ever expected but I guess that happens. I was planning on helping encourage things alone after our trip to Florida in a few weeks. However as a surprise to me things naturally happened and we stopped the day we headed for vacation to see my family in South Dakota and Indiana. 

Nobody will tell you to stop right before a vacation but that’s how it happened and a week later she isn’t asking anymore. In fact, since day 1 (a week ago Sunday) she’s only asked maybe 3 -5 times and was easily redirected each time. This includes on multiple planes, in new environments, and going to sleep on her own. (Which she’s also mastered I must admit. It’s almost like she looks forward to sleep now. That’s my girl!) 

This is only one of many journeys that has come to an end. My little lady is growing up and becoming even more independent. She wants to feed herself, listen to specific songs, walk on her own two feet and in her own direction, and lives as though it’s her world and we all live in it. I’m so blessed to be her mom. 

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